With Jamie, I had zero symptoms the entire pregnancy and spent most of it convinced something was wrong. I was not prepared for what came after. From my hospital bed, still in my gown, running on zero sleep and approximately one granola bar, I texted my friends everything I was learning in real time. I've thought about that note ever since. Here it is, lightly edited, with the benefit of hindsight.
Hi!!! Just wanted to send some notes along while I am thinking of them. Feel free to ignore/use what you want.
- Pack a couple of zip swaddles for safe sleep. I forgot mine and made my mom drive them over after the first night because I was too paranoid that the swaddle we did ourselves with the blanket would come loose while Jamie slept.
- I overpacked clothes. I'm still in my gown lol and I didn't end up showering. That's fine.
- MVPs from my bag: long phone charger, empty tote bag, your own pillows, the Hatch sound machine, snacks, a fluffy blanket, and a bath towel for your partner.
- Be mentally prepared for information overload but also tell them if it's too much or if you want them to come back at a different time — they will. Just be as honest as possible about how you're feeling. If you open up to them they will give you so much help and attention. I cried 2x in front of my nurses. It was the right call.
- They need to know number and time of feedings and diapers so keep track of that either on paper or using an app or your phone. Time runs together so you won't remember.
- If possible take advantage of the nursery one or both nights so you can sleep. DONT FEEL BAD ABOUT IT.
- If breastfeeding hurts or is too much just ask for formula. They may not suggest it but if you ask they have to give it to you. Same with a pacifier. They also brought me a pump without me having to track one down — just ask and they'll sort it. Fed is fed, and you know your situation.
- Don't be shy with your nurse button to ask for questions or help or assistance with anything.
It will be great!!!
The thing I forgot to put on the list
One more thing I wasn't mentally prepared for: the number of shift changes. New nurses, new faces, everyone catching up on you while you're still processing what just happened and figuring out how to keep a tiny human alive. The transitions were smooth, everyone seemed briefed, but it still added to the overwhelm in a way I didn't expect. Nothing you can do about it. I just wish someone had said it out loud.